Author Archives: Rhonda J. Smith

Covetous Christmas

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Tis the season to be covetous. . . I know you thought I was going to say “to be jolly” because that’s how the song goes, but as I really paid attention to this season I recognize that Christmas has become a season of covetousness. Covetous is from the root word covet, which means to desire, want, long for, yearn for, crave. I have seen magazine covers advertise dresses to “lust for.” I’ve heard commercials say that if you buy this people will envy you. And many of us have heard the saying “you will be the talk of the town” if you have this. With the promotions to buy has come the targeting of man’s base nature. We all are vulnerable to our fleshy desires.

Many Christians recognize that Christmas has become commercialized, where the emphasis is on buying things and not recognizing the gift, the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. We have combated that by sending out Christmas cards with the message of Christ and limiting the amount spent on and the number of Christmas gifts given. But even with these limitations, we have to make sure that we still are not guilty of covetousness. Sure, it is okay to desire certain things, but are the things you desire the things God would have you to desire? Let’s check our heart against the following scripture:

    You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife. You shall not set your desire on your neighbor’s house or land, his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor (Deuteronomy 5:21).

Do you want a new coat, car, clothes and toys for the children because your neighbor (sister or brother in Christ, co-worker, nieces and nephews, etc.) has those things? Do you want certain items because you believe obtaining them will give you the status of your neighbor? Do you sacrifice to buy because you want people to covet after what you have? Would having the things you want make you haughty? Answering yes to any question makes you guilty of covetousness.

But God tells us to covet the best gifts and to prophesy (1 Corinthians 12:31, 14:39). Of all the gifts from God we know that our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is right at the top. Let us covet Jesus, a relationship with him, deep fellowship with him, and an attitude like his. Let us covet to prophesy about his goodness and what the gift of Jesus means to the entire world. Truly let us go beyond rejecting commercialism to also rejecting covetousness. Let not “remember the reason for the season” simply be an adage from our lips but love from our hearts that shows in speaking and teaching about the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and what his gift to the world provides, which is redemption for all those who receive him.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

5 Steps to a Good Reputation

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“Woe to you when all men speak well of you, for that is how their fathers treated the false prophets” (Luke 6:26).

Having a good reputation to some means that everyone says good things about you and that everyone likes you. But as the scripture above shows, having everyone speak well of you is not necessarily a good thing. Even as I’ve been discussing having a good reputation, my focus has not been on what people think or say about you, but it’s all been about you doing what God tells you to do, handling your holy business, if you will. This is what gives you a good reputation in the eyes of God, your family and the world.

God may be pleased, your family may speak well of you, but the world may simply not say anything bad about you, and that doesn’t mean they will say something good about you. And if you have a good reputation, when the world says something bad about you, you won’t be guilty of their accusations. This is what the scripture means when it charges believers to be blameless. So how do you gain a good reputation where 1) God is pleased; 2) your family speaks well of you; and 3) you are blameless before the world?

Count Up the Cost—Before endeavoring to do anything, make sure you have what it takes to complete the task. Only proceed when you can give your all. You don’t want to be known as the unreliable saint.
Keep Your Word—This is similar to the first but deserves its own category for people who intentionally commit to something with no intentions of following through or with the thought they can always cancel if the commitment they made inconveniences them. Be a woman of integrity.
Avoid the Appearance of Evil—Don’t go to places where people can question whether or not as a Christian you should be there. Such places could include the casino, bars and going on a trip with your boyfriend. You may just be eating, dancing or enjoying a warm island, but the appearance could be that you are gambling, getting drunk and having premarital sex. Don’t give anyone fodder for gossip.
Be Selfless—Go out of your way, if possible, to help others. Think of them before yourself.
Don’t compromise—Don’t make excuses for your bad behavior or others’ sin just because you like them. Waffling makes you look weak concerning your beliefs.

Using these five tips is a great start to gaining a good reputation. Always seek the Lord and use His word and you will be a blameless Christian who pleases God and your family adores.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Reputed Saint

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When teaching me about preserving a good reputation, my mother used to tell me, “Whatever you do, be able to look at yourself in the mirror in the morning.” This was her way of saying that I shouldn’t be ashamed to face myself, that I should accept whatever my life reflects to me and others. I used my mom’s mirror barometer for most of my life until a bad decision resulted in an unforeseen consequence for me, and I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror, and I wondered what others would think of me. I was ashamed of who I was and didn’t want to see myself. This didn’t change until I looked into a different mirror, the mirror of God’s word:

“For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing” Romans 1:23-25.

I wanted the reflection of my life to show that I saw my flaws and worked to fix them and that I avoided self-imposed standards because the barometer for my reputation was the mirror of God’s word. Doing so would garner me a good reputation, one that could tell other Christians, as the Apostle Paul did, “follow me as I follow Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1). I wanted people to know that I was obeying God rather than man (Acts 5:29) so even non-believers in Jesus Christ would glorify God in the end (1 Peter 2:12).

God calls us to seek a good reputation, not for money and material items or popularity but so we will be a great example for other Christians and those outside the faith. This seeking is about God’s kingdom. We have to stop being concerned about whether we like what our personal mirrors reflect and allow the Bible to be the mirror that we use.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

A Significant Reputation

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    “. . .(A)nd let her works praise her in the gates” (Proverbs 31:31).

Some days are ponder days, and this weekend I had one of those days. As I thought about my accomplishments in comparison to what I still have yet to do, I lamented a bit. My ministry has not had the far-reaching impact that I expected. And as I thought about not having a broader audience like some of my secular counterparts, I heard the Lord say, “You want success and not significance.” Immediately I received the correction. The impact I wanted came with fame; the impact that is necessary comes with a making a positive difference.

Some months ago I learned a good deal about the difference between success and significance. My pastor, Christopher W. Brooks, preached a message on this, warning Christians that our lives should not be about seeking fame and being successful according to the world’s standard of obtaining money and material items and being well-known; we must be about changing lives for Christ’s sake, starting within our own homes.

This was the success of the Proverbs 31 woman. She took care of her husband, children and maids. Because she looked “well to the ways of her household” and was a hard worker, she had a good reputation; her work taking care of her home—a small audience—garnered her praise in her hometown. As I reviewed Pastor Brooks’ message, I understood more what God was telling me: I didn’t want what I already had; I wanted what someone else had. And what I have is significance because I am making a positive influence in the lives of those in my sphere, the gates that He has me within.

I’m not saying that we should shun money, material items or popularity. But our emphasis should be on accomplishing the goals God has given to us, and these goals always start with taking care of home. This is the greatest area of significance. This gives you a good reputation.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Work It Right

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Right before Halloween I saw a woman at Target that I used to work with. She looked a bit harried. No, she looked downright frazzled and worn. I asked how she was doing, and she gave me the obligatory “fine” before going into why she was at the store and rushing to get out:

“Girl, yeah I still work there. Um, hum,” she said as she pierced her lips and rolled her eyes. “I have four kids, so going to work is a break for me, though. I’m at Target to get Halloween costumes. They have costumes for Trick or Treating, for a party at school and one of them has a birthday party that I had to get a costume and a gift for. Yeah, girl. When I get home, they be wanting to climb on me and get hugs and help with homework. I say, ‘Ask your daddy. Shoot. I’ve been working all day.’”

“All right, girl. I’ll see you later. God bless you, okay?”

“All right, Rhonda. See you later.”

And I hope to see her later to tell her, “That ain’t right. It ain’t right that you are 1) working a job to get away from your kids; 2) working hard to get your kids multiple Halloween costumes; 3) working hard to shun your children’s affection; and 4) working hard to avoid helping your kids with homework. It just ain’t right. This is not the working hard that a mother should do.” Many of us are hard workers, working hard at the wrong things and not having the energy to work hard at the right things, like cleaning our homes, nurturing our husbands and children, and being a reliable and trustworthy friend. This just ain’t right!

The best question to ask is “Is what I’m choosing to do most beneficial for what God has called me to do?” This was the question that stood out in my mind when I had to make the decision about feeding and educating my first child. It was breast milk v. formula and home school v. public school. I had good reason to choose formula over breast milk because Joshua could not latch on. And every indicator pointed to God guiding me to home school my attention craved child. I chose to express my breast milk so Joshua could have the best food available to him and to home school though I felt ill-equipped and non-desirous.

On many occasions I felt like my old colleague. In fact, I would say about Joshua’s clinginess, “He didn’t get the memo. The (umbilical) cord has been cut!” In my flesh I didn’t want to express milk and THEN have to feed my baby or homeschool. Using formula and sending Josh to school would have been more convenient for me. But I knew breast milk and home school would be best for him so I worked hard to give him both. We all must decide what’s most beneficial in order to accomplish what God has called us to do and not what we want to do. Working hard ain’t easy, but doing so for the right things saves a lot of time and energy and truly pleases the Lord.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith