Operate from Purpose, Not Pain

If god dwells in me, with me, He should be evident in what I say and do. I must remember that He dwells and give Him free reign to respond for me, to say and do what I should say and do. Sometimes that’s hard when people have hurt me. My focus can be on the pain, responding to it instead of the present issues regardless of their merit. I know I’m not alone.

We can take this habit into all our relationships, including parenting, and the pain response only complicates issues. I explore this further in my latest EEW column, which begins below:

I recall only one painful moment at the hands of my parents, my mother actually. She called me snotty. I don’t remember what I had done, but I remember the crush in my spirit when my mom called me a name. There may have been other times, but they haven’t stuck with me.

Overall, my parents encouraged me, provided materially well for me and gave me a good moral foundation. They were good parents. My dad has since passed and was only able to see me parent the first of his grandsons. My mom has seen my husband and me in action, up close this year for the six months she lived with us. Without going into detail let me just say she has tried to impose her parenting methods on me, and some of her comments have been painful. She has even caused me to question my parenting skills.

I can only imagine what impact the pain on those of you who grew up with abusive parents has had on your psyche and all your relationships, including your parenting one. I empathize with you; my childhood painful moment still stings a bit and my adulthood painful moments are still fresh. But in all of your pain and mine, one thing remains true: Jesus died to set the captives free. This is more than us being loosed from Satan’s bound but includes us being loosed from our broken hearts, our setbacks, and our letdowns (Isaiah 61:1-3). We know Jesus is the remedy for all our pain, helping us to parent out of purpose instead of pain. Read the rest here.

My One Thousand Gifts List

Faydra Deon responding so quickly to fixing my website
Tyora responding to fix my site according to our previously worked out conditions
Christen being here to care for the children while I resolved my website issue
Going on a double date with Nicole and Jeremi
Jeremi wanting to preserve the moment with a picture
Attending and covering the EACH Resource Fair
Working with Ruby Bailey
Seeing Charyse flow in her gift on the EACH artists’ stage
Brother Joe telling me how proud he was of me contributing to Your First Year of Motherhood
Seeing LaSonjia and Sterling volunteer with EACH